Red Bull New York Launches Mascot
His name is "Redd." Get it? GET IT?!?!?!
Forgive me, because I can feel myself becoming twenty different shades of hypocritical.
So anyway, if you missed it, Red Bull New York (the MLS team based in New Jersey that fields a team called The New York Red Bulls) released a brand new mascot out into the world. The Red Bull, named Redd (with Two Ds) made his debut with his Gen Z broccoli-cut and sunglasses because that’s what the kids are into! First impressions were immediate cringe. This has such a “Poochie The Dog” vibe, like that character that was ham-fisted into the Itchy & Scratchy cartoon on The Simpsons.
But it’s weird for me, right? Because I don’t typically hate mascots. Mascots are fun. Mascots are a great way to get kids involved. In fact, the only reason why I knew The Red Bulls were having a new mascot is because of the “release party” that had both Sparky The Dragon AND Mr. and Mrs. Met in attendance. No word if NyIsles got an invite.
Wait, Spider-Man showed up??! And Redd SKATEBOARDS too? lol wtfff
But then I had to check myself. Like if you love mascots, why are you hating on this one? “Maybe,” I thought. “Maybe I hate mascots in soccer.” I know, I know. I am a staunch defender of soccer over football. Or I should say, the American interpretation of soccer. Not so much that I feel our take on the game is superior, but I really detest when our version of the game is dismissed JUST because its American. So I say things like “soccer,” and I love when a team like St. Louis calls themselves St. Louis City, Soccer Club, (and am disappointed when a team like LAFC calls themselves a Football Club). That said, I feel mascots are a very “American thing.” Not sure if that’s true and I’m way too lazy to look it up, but inserting a mascot just makes things seem a bit hokey.
Then I remembered the LA Galaxy, the MLS team I support, has a mascot too. Cozmo, an alien because at one time they took the Galaxy name very literally, has been the mascot FOR YEARS. And while I am neutral on the critter, it doesn’t rile me up either.
But I also cannot defend this.
Maybe I just hate fun, I don’t know…
Nah, screw that bull.