New York Sports are Having a Bonkers Week
It's Like if Everything Was Written By The Onion
Though I call Los Angeles my “home” these days, I consider myself a Brooklyn Kid through and through. Sometimes I hesitate when someone calls me a “New Yorker,” my love for my hometown is so dang specific. So of course I try keep myself up to date with what is happening with the Empire State. And let me tell you, it’s been a wild ride making hay of what has happened the past seven days.
It all started this past weekend when the New York Mets had their fan fest. Called “Amazin’ Day,” there were some spirited discussions, activities and a few reveals. Like the new Mets road uniforms for next season, for example:
Hey they are loud, bright, and features just enough throwback elements for it to be a “buy” from me, but most people were more focused on what team owner Steve Cohen said about the extended Pete Alonso contract discussions. Cohen claimed he was being “brutally honest” and that the whole thing was “exhausting.” Check it:
When the owner of the team is TIRED of you AND he’s from New York? He’s going to let the whole dang world know! This is like when you ask someone out on a date, they tell you they’ll respond after work and then go on social media like “Ugh, this person on my phone is so annoying!” It’s currently a rough time for the Polar Bear, lemme tell you. Like if you end up resigning with the Mets, do you even talk to your boss after that?
Speaking of baseball:
Mets Minor League affiliate the Binghamton Rumble Ponies decided that their name wasn’t weird enough and motioned to adopt the identity of the Binghamton Bathtub Donkeys for a couple of games next season. The. Bathtub. Donkeys.
Yes, minor league teams have alternate identities all the time, but even I was confused about this. Apparently, it was at one point illegal to house a donkey in a bathtub, which was a fact I can tell you was known by next to no one. From MLB.com
"We began to dig into the kind of laws that are just kind of bizarre and wacky, like Minor League Baseball is," said Rumble Ponies director of marketing and promotion Eddie Saunders, speaking during the Jan. 17 episode of MiLB.com’s The Show Before The Show podcast. "We found this law that in the 1800s, in Brooklyn. … you could not have a sleeping donkey in your bathtub on Sundays.
I know sometimes we lament thinking by committee, but I can guarantee you any committee would’ve said that was a horrible idea. Do we chant “Let’s Go Donkeys,” or “Bath. Tub,” followed by three claps in rapid succession?
Moving on from baseball, did I tell you about the time when New York Knicks star Karl Anthony Towns did a jersey swap with actor Timothée Chalamet?
Yeah, that happened this week too.
The New York Jets got both a new GM in Darren Mougey and a new head coach in Aaron Glenn. The Jets, a longstanding example of continued futility in professional football, are doing everything possible but selling off the team. And while you can’t fault the new hires for being positive about the future of the franchise, coach Glenn went ahead and said this:
"Put your seatbelts on and get ready for the ride," he said. "We're the freaking New York Jets and we're built for this [shit]."
Built for what, exactly? When was the last time any one has said anything about the Jets with pride? When was the last winning record?
Well…whatever this is, Coach Glenn is built for it.
And lastly, my favorite hockey team the New York Islanders are currently the hottest team in the NHL. This is especially wild because up until a few weeks ago, it looked like it would be a lost season. The win streaks are taking so many people by surprise, that even the New York Times doesn’t know how to comprehend what’s happening:
Islanders Hockey: Get In Your Feelings. They’re doing that thing again, playing well, winning games, making you happy and frustrated and mad all at the same time, leaving you wondering where this team was the first three months of the season.
Beats me too. And who knows what comes next? Is it better to enjoy the ride or hope for common sense to prevail?
Heck if I know. - Arthur Staple (The Athletic/NY Times)
Check out the actual title of the article.
Lmao, I swear. New York is a sports funhouse right now.