Final Fast and Furious Finally Gets Title
Eleventh (!) Edition of Car Franchise Set To Arrive in 2028.
Fans of the “Fast and Furious” franchise (or is it “The Fast and the Furious?”) will have to wait until 2028 for the reported final installment to hit theaters. Announced Friday, the flick will sport the official name: Fast Forever.
Fast. Forever. I mean, I guess?
It’s better than the 8th edition title of “The Fate of the Furious,” which always makes me think of hangry people on a mission to find a brunch spot. But “Fast Forever” is locked in for what’s believed to be the last Fast and Furious film, ever! And by that, I mean until they eventually spin off or reboot the series. And that’s not even counting the cartoon:
Because I’m ALWAYS asking my friends what Dominic Toretto’s little cousin is doing these days.
When it comes to the Fast & Furious franchise, it’s basically a mixed bag for a lot of people. Either you hate it, and feel it’s emblematic of Hollywood’s lack of creativity and penchant for running ideas into the ground. Or, you love the (eventual) ridiculousness of it all with a resounding “Hell Yeah!” I found myself somewhere in the middle: I thought the first film took itself way too seriously, hopped on board by the second one, believed it peaked at the fifth one, and now I’m too pot-committed to not see how the story plays out, despite the last couple of films feeling flat. I also have the irrational anger about how unnecessary “Hobbs & Shaw” was, but that’s another thing entirely.
As a former film analyst, I can also drone on how something that could have been poignant about the THEME of family, got dumbed down to the point where family became a cudgel of a plot device, but I’ll put the snobbery away.
I am glad the main story is coming to an end, though. Even though about 12-15 years have passed in-story, the Fast & Furious franchise has been around for about 25 calendar years. When the first film dropped in 2001, CSI: Crime Scene Investigation was all the rage. Vin Diesel isn’t my favorite actor, but someone needs to free the 58-year-old actor from the shackles of sleeveless shirts and mumbling things on camera:
Even though the franchise has been the most profitable Universal Studios franchise of all time, it doesn’t seem to cross generations like other franchises do, such as Star Wars and Harry Potter. Moms and dads aren’t taking their kids to see Fast and Furious movies. The theaters are instead filled with older millennials who feel they are still too young for World War II movies, just yet. The movies have pulled in a combined $7.5 billion dollars, which is more than both Universal’s Jurassic Park franchise ($6.3 billion), and Despicable Me ($5.6 billion).
There’s also the issue that it’s a franchise that’s not really for car people, (or fans of covert counterterrorism unit movies…?) anymore. What would you say is a Fast and Furious movie these days? I guess if it has a couple of exotic locations, a forgettable villains, and a soundtrack that keeps Wiz Khalifa employed, you can call it day.
Speaking of, the one guy they haven’t brought back was the dude from 2 Fast 2 Furious. He was fun:
“And you, I’ll take my cutter back.” He’s like a vanilla Tony Montana, and that’s perfect for car-based, quasi illegal errand missions.
Fast Forever. I’ll be there day one. I have to see whether or not they make it to Atlantis or whatever.
Last thing: Did you know that the series goes by the name “Wild Speed” in Japan?
The Fast and the Furious (2001)—Wild Speed
2 Fast 2 Furious (2003)—Wild Speed X2
The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift (2006)—Wild Speed X3: Tokyo Drift
Fast & Furious (2009)—Wild Speed MAX
Fast Five (2011)—Wild Speed MEGA MAX
Fast & Furious 6 (2013)—Wild Speed: Euro Mission
Furious 7 (2015)—Wild Speed: Sky Mission
The Fate of the Furious (2017)—Wild Speed: Ice Break
Hobbs & Shaw (2019)—Wild Speed: Super Combo
F9—Wild Speed: Jet Break
Fast X—Wild Speed: Fire Boost
The last one has GOT to be “End Mission,” right?